Welcome to WWW Wednesdays (on Thursday) here at SmartHotFun.Com.

If you’ve been following along, I've been breaking down Great Sex Fundamental 2: Sex Is A Skill.

I've broken down how you need to beef up your physical, mental, and interpersonal skills to step up your sex game. I’ve talked about the importance of taking some risks in order to develop those skills. Even though many of us don't like to think about failure when it comes to great sex, I got a little real with y'all and prepped you for that inevitable epic sex fail. I also talked about how it might be a great idea to get yourself a coach.

So when you're trying to make your sex skills great, what comes next?

GSF 2.5: Surround Yourself With People Who Support You

A picture of a Sex Support Team Chart.

At this point, I've put a lot of the responsibility for building great sex skills on you. I've made it your responsibility to step up your game by beefing up your skills, by challenging you to take risks, by prepping you for failure, and by saying you should get a coach. All of these things are really important if you're looking to have great sex.

Greatness is definitely something that comes from within.

However, if you look at people who rise to ridiculous levels of greatness, it is a rarity if they can say they got there completely on their own.

Because the playoffs are upon us, and I fucking love football, I'm going to use the NFL as an example. Even though my heart belongs to college ball, I have to admit that the guys playing in the NFL have football skills that guys at the college level can only dream of achieving.

Obviously.

Part of the reason why NFL players are so much better is because they've been playing longer. Which means that they've been developing their skills longer, been coached longer, and have failed so many times that they have developed streamlined coping mechanisms for moments of failure.

I would also argue that a player in the NFL has reached their level of greatness because they surrounded themselves with people who supported them all throughout their careers.

Sometimes those people are the people they love, sometimes those people are the fans, and sometimes those people are their teammates and coaches. Regardless of who supports them, many who make it to the NFL have “cheerleaders.”

While sometimes, those “cheerleaders” are actual cheerleaders, men who make it to the NFL have people around them who believe in their greatness and continuously challenge them to maintain their greatness. I mean, think about it. Any time an NFL player wins a prestigious award, they don't just go off about how amazing they are. They thank their support team. They thank their parents, their coaches, their teammates, and anyone else who encouraged them and supported them and challenged them to consistently stand out amongst a league that is defined by greatness.

Even though they might have worked really hard individually to get where they are,  these NFL players recognize that the people around them were just as important to their football success as they were.

Sex Time!

Although this might be the craziest sounding of the principles related to upping your sex skills, surrounding yourself with people who support your progress is going to be clutch.

If you have people around you to support you during your quest to have great sex, they pat you on the back when you succeed and make you feel great about your success. When you fail, they're there to give you a hug or give you a pep talk or even just listen to you when you need to talk it out. People who support you might even be there to give you the outside perspective that you need to get past failures or roadblocks or other things that might be standing in the way of your sexual greatness.

Human beings are often better when we rely on other human beings to give us perspective.

So when you're thinking about who should be a part of your great sex support team, your partner should probably be one of those people (just sayin'). But just like NFL pros get support from folks they’re not actually playing with, it's a great idea to recruit someone you’re not having sex with to be a part of your support team.

Which brings me to:

Action Steps for Great Action

1. Brainstorm A List Of Supportive Peeps

1. Make a list of friends, family members, and acquaintances that you think would make a good part of your support team.

2. Write this list of friends down on a sheet of paper or in a word document.

3. Cross out anyone who you feel would respond in an "ick" or "yuck" kind of way while talking to you about your sex life.

What I mean by this is, cross out anyone who you think would respond to your desires by saying things like “that's nasty” or “you're weird.” Although it's totally cool to grab beers with this person, they're not the best person to cheerlead you into sexual greatness.

4. Cross out anyone who you don't think will be able to give you advice outside of their own experience.

For example: If you have a friend who always gives advice by starting off with the phrase, “Well what I do in this situation is...,” cross them off your list. Sex is one of those things where you need a support team that can give you advice that is suited specifically to you, and not just a rehashing of what they’ve done. If this person has never tried to give you advice that is specifically about you, they may not be capable of giving you the support you need.

5. Look at your list to see who's left.

6. Pick one friend from this list.

7. Tell this friend that you are embarking on a great sex journey. Tell them that it would be such a huge honor if they would be willing to help you. Ask them if it's okay for you to confide in them when you need help along the way.

8. If they say yes, take them up on their offer and remember to appreciate them and their help.

9. Repeat this process with as many people as you’d like.

2. Organize A Sexual Greatness Group

Do you have a whole group of friends who you think would be totally down for helping each other to achieve sexual greatness on a regular basis?

Then get organized! Get all of these great folks together, be straight up about your goals, and see if they would be down to get together to talk about how to encourage each other toward sexual greatness.  You guys can chat once a week, twice a month, or however often you can make it work.

It's like a book club, but instead of discussing literature, y'all will be discussing things you can do to make your sex skills a whole lot better.

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If you want to build up those great skills remember to:

GSF 2.5: Surround Yourself With People Who Support You

I hope that your recruiting effort is as successful as Cal Football’s has been thus far!

Go Bears … and…

Go Get Some!
-Becca

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