I Want! Great Sex Fundamentals: Vulvas and Vaginas

I’ve told you all about how your brain is a powerful mutha' when it comes to sex.

I’ve broken down erogenous zones (e-zones from here on out) and the role that blood flow has in making your e-zones come to sexy, hot life!

Today, I’m going to spend some time breakin’ down my personal e-zone faves the vulva and vagina! (They’re only my faves because I happen to be a very proud owner of these body parts! Penes are cool too.)

Great Sex Fundamental #3: Vulvas dig dexterity.  Vaginas dig motion and fullness.

If at this point, you’re like … “Why is Becca talking about cars and vaginas?  Are we talking about car sex today?”  You need to click this link to help you figure out the difference between the vulva and vagina.  Just sayin’.

That post in a nutshell?  The vulva is all the outside stuff, the vagina is inside the body.

What does this have to do with great sex?

If you already know about e-zones, you know that where there are nerve endings and aroused blood flow, there can be sexual pleasure.

The vulva has WAY more nerve endings than the vagina.

Although the vagina holds it own when it comes to nerve endings, most of those nerve endings are packed into the 1/3 of the vagina closest to the outside of the body.

So when we’re talking degree of sexual sensitivity based on nerve endings in the vagina and vulva … the vulva wins.  That isn’t to say that vagina owners don’t enjoy having their vaginas played with.  Playing with the vagina still feels good. It simply means that if you’re looking for the most sensitive stimulation for a vulva/vagina owner, the outside bits are your best bet.

In terms of type of stimulation, I always recommend chatting up whoever’s vulva and/or vagina you’re playing with for some pinpointed direction.

However, if you’re looking at pleasure based on how nerve endings work, here is the breakdown:

For the Vulva and outer 1/3 of the vagina, dexterous sensation is key.

What do I mean by dexterous?  The kind of movement your fingers are capable of.  The kind of movement a tongue can do.  The kind of stimulation that breath can bring. Examples of the kind of vulva pleasing movement I’m talking about?  Licking, stroking, sucking, tugging, and vibration.

To put it another way, the kind of stimulation that really works with the nerve endings in the vulva is the kind of stimulation where penises and dildos don’t excel.

While the dildo/penis style stimulation isn’t necessarily to best for the outer parts of lady bits, the dildo/penis is fantastic for the inner 2/3 of the vagina.

Pressure, Motion, and Fullness all feel great on the inner 2/3rds of the vagina! 

Don’t get me wrong, the dexterous sensations mentioned earlier can still feel good on this part of the vagina.  However, the decreased amount of nerve endings means that dexterous sensations don’t pack as much punch in the vagoo as they do on the vulva.

So let me reiterate this week’s great sex fundamental:

Great Sex Fundamental #3: Vulvas dig dexterity.  Vaginas dig motion and fullness. 

Action Steps for Great Action

So, what do you do with this knowledge?  Here are two suggestions:

1. If you are the proud owner of a vulva and/or vagina, take some time to think about what feels good where when someone is hunchin’ down and pleasuring your lady parts.  Write down 2 items that you think every partner you bang it out with should know.

1) Every partner should know that I enjoy when my clit is lightly played like a bongo.
2)  Upon first penetration during penis-vagina sex, I like for dudebro to swirl their penis-tip around in my vaginal opening before going for the thrusting motion.

2. If you like to sex up the owners of vulvas and/or vaginas, ask a partner or potential partner 1 way that they enjoy having their vulva stimulated and 1 way they enjoy having their vagina stimulated.  Implement as many strategies as possible.

Example: I don’t know what a bongo is, so I can’t play my GF’s clit like one.  However, I love soft serve and can give her an amazing swirl before I start in on the hardcore thrusting.  Done.

So!  There it is.  I definitely think it’s time for you to …

Go Get Some!


The vulva puppet featured in today's article was one I used while I worked at Good Vibrations and is made by House O' Chicks!